Back to the hospital again...

WoW....

what a year this has been. What a trip this has been. And not one that I am relishing so far....

Yesterday, Italia, our cousin / almost little sister... was helivaced to the hospital with injuries from a go-cart accident.

Italia and her younger sister Haley have been an integral part of our immediate family since they were about 4 months old. My sister was there babysitter on the weekends. And from there they just kind of took root. Fourteen years later they have their own room and spend about 3 nights a week at my parents home. Like I said... they are more like little sisters than cousins, but I think cousin is their official title.

Italia sustained injuries from a go-cart rollover accident. She has several broken bones in her hand and has basically tore the top of her right hand off. From her wrist to her knuckles she has exposed tissue, tendons, ligaments, nerves, and bone. Needless to say extensive damage to her dominant hand.

More damage than what our local doctors felt they could handle. So they have sent her to the nearest (5 1/2 hours away) kids hospital in Birmingham late last night.

She is on heavy medication and antibiotics. Morphine every 2 hours. She will undergo a cleaning and sterilization tonight. Then Monday if the hand is still clean they will take the tendons from under her arm and begin to rebuild her hand, possibly taking more tendons from her other arm. Once they feel the tendons have properly healed they will begin the skin grafts.

She will spend Christmas in the hospital. And she is not to happy about it. My dad has several doctors appointments here in Florida. So we will be traveling back and forth from hospital to hospital this Christmas.

It just does not seem like Christmas for us.....yet. The Christmas spirit just seems like too much work. This year in our family we have lost Harry's dad, my great grandfather, and my uncle. Also two helicopter rides to hospitals. Kayne and Harry are a Continent and 8 hour time change away.

I have bought almost zero Christmas presents. The only ones I have are the ones I brought from Greece.... and I still do not have my luggage yet. I love to go shopping....is was something I did almost everyday when we lived in Atlanta... but I am loathing the thoughts of dragging myself aisle after aisle trying to find gifts for my loved ones. And the crowds.... and traffic.

I need to find the holiday spirit. We are taking my niece Kadence to see the Nutcracker Ballet in a few days... maybe that will help. I am going to try reading the Christmas story over and over until the Holy Spirit allows the scenery of the manger, wise men, Mary, and baby Jesus to flood my mind.

I have the warmth of family and friends. My mom has the house decorated. Even my little niece has her playhouse decorated. I see Christmas everywhere... it's just not inside me yet. I hope this is not what it is going to feel like with military living. This is not our first Christmas in the military, but it is our first overseas military Christmas. And so far it's rough. I am hoping it's because of our traumatic year.

In the past, I my agenda has been filled to the brink. The past few years... was the church Christmas play. I wrote and helped produce a Church Christmas play for about 100 kids. We were so busy creating, painting, sewing, rehearsing. Not sure if I am missing the busyness or what. I know I would prefer to be busy beyond sleep with a play than sit in a hospital room.

Any suggestions on how to find the Christmas Spirit? As a Christian and a pastor's / Chaplain's wife I feel guilty to not feeling the holiday spirit. For us Christmas and Easter are our "Superbowl's" our "World Series" and I don't even feel like tailgating.

I am sure God is teaching me something here....I just don't see it yet.

Blessings to those with the CHRISTmas Spirit, (could you pass it along)

Kristie